Are you aware of how quickly people will form an opinion about you? A few years ago there was a television commercial for a major health insurance company.

The strap line of this commercial was - You Are Amazing! It made the point that every human being is unique and totally different from any other on the planet. People are such wonderful, complex and complicated individuals. Our bodies are all constructed differently, and our minds, even more so!

When we meet and interact with other individuals we exchange all sorts of information. This is communicated by the words we use, our tone of voice and our body language.

Research by psychologists suggests that we all make about eleven decisions about other people within two minutes of meeting them. We decide whether we like the other person, what their background is, how intelligent they are, how positive or negative, how successful, and other factors that are important to us as individuals. We tend to stick with these decisions until proved otherwise.

I read a report in the media, just before the Wimbledon tennis tournament in 2008. It was suggesting that many people didn't want Andy Murray, the Scottish tennis player, to do well in the tournament. These people said that they didn't like him, based on seeing him interviewed on TV or playing tennis. They felt he was too dour and lacked personality. Some people even suggested that he would be a difficult person to deal with.

This fast decision making process, based on very little information, and be it right or wrong, is one of our built in programs. When our cavemen ancestors were wandering around, club in hand, in a hostile environment; they often came upon other cavemen and scary creatures. In order to survive, they had to make quick decisions - 'Do I strike up a conversation with this other creature, do I make a run for it, or do I bash them with my club?

So, be very much aware; when someone meets you for the first time, or speaks to you on the phone; they are making several decisions about you, just as you are making decisions about them. They may even be deciding within seconds if you're a difficult person, and of course, you may also come to the same decision.

At this point; you may be saying to your self - 'That's just too bad, because I am as I am; that's my personality. I was born this way, I was brought up this way, and there's not much I can do about it.' Well there is!

Let me explain; this isn't about your personality, it's about behaviour and thoughts. Behaviour and thoughts are learned and they can be unlearned and replaced with something else.

Take charge of your behaviour and don't take chances with your first impression.

Alan Fairweather, 'The Motivation Doctor,' is an International Business Speaker, Best Selling Author and Sales Growth Expert. For the past seventeen years, he's been developing the talents of Managers, Sales and Customer Service people, and turning them into consistent top performers.

He is the author of: 'How to Manage Difficult People' Proven strategies for dealing with challenging behaviour at work.

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