Have you ever arrived at the end of the interview process, worn-out but optimistic, only to be turned down by your top candidate? It's almost worse than the disappointment of a teenage date rejection. What's going on here? Weren't you supposed to be the person in the power chair? Shouldn't this person be overjoyed to receive your offer?

Unless the candidate received a better offer from another company, the reason for the rejection was probably your company's failure to develop a relationship with the candidate. Experienced top performers may be hesitant about taking a job with people whom they do not know or do not like; they are much more likely to accept when they feel that they have established a connection with future managers and co-workers. I myself got burned when I was a young and naïve college grad and have since become very careful about investigating future managers and team members. Let me share my personal experience.

My first interview after graduation went exceptionally well. I was thoroughly impressed with my prospective manager and enjoyed our conversation. The company made an offer and I accepted with excitement. On my first day, I learned that I would be working under another manager, an individual whom I had not previously met. Although I didn't ask why I was being moved, it only took me a few minutes to understand the reason: the real manager was the Wicked Witch of the West, complete with a pointy black hat, a nasty broom, and vicious flying monkeys.

She was not allowed to be a part of the interview process because her coarse personality and a bad attitude would have terrified any good candidates. I sucked it up and stayed with her for exactly two years, the minimum amount of time I had set for my first position. I then transferred within the company and received a number of promotions. Although I loved the organization, I was absolutely miserable for the first two years of my employment.

Today's job-seekers are more cautious and less patient than I was. They are more likely to dismiss an employer and resign rather than work in an unhealthy environment. Since nobody wants a bad boss or back-stabbing peers, candidates need to have a realistic image of their daily interactions before they make a jump. As human resources professionals, we need to provide the information that candidates need to make a sound and informed career decision. That information includes meetings with their real manager and, when possible, their prospective peers.

Historically, companies have performed numerous, successive interviews to screen and approve candidates. This proceeding resembled a Native American gauntlet: if you made it to the end, your life was spared and you got the job. Today, arranging smooth, friendly meetings with management and peers is key to recruiting top performers. Good candidates require a full view of the company and the team that they are about to join. That's why The Hamister Group focuses on relationship-building during second interviews.

As a recruiter, I foster and promote connection between the management, co-workers, and candidates through meticulous preparation.  I tell candidates about their prospective managers and co-workers during the first interview: I overview each person's position, their role within our team, their relationship to the position in question, and my own personal impressions. Keep in mind that I am certainly not giving any advice on how the candidates should act or what they should say in the second interview; I am simply building comfort and helping the candidates to look forward to the next meeting. Stressful interviews do not benefit anyone.

In order to give my team members an optimum opportunity to really get to know their prospective reports, I perform all of my due diligence before a candidate even arrives at the second interview. This means that during the first interview and before the second, I have already established that candidates share our values, culture, and work ethic. I have verified their fundamental skills and have provided detailed documents in the candidate's file, including the write-up from the first interview, reference write-ups , application, resume, motor vehicle check, background check, credit check, and any other necessary tests.

The information that I provide to the candidate and to my team members helps them both to develop a good feeling before they even meet. Time is better spent because my team members do not have to wonder whether candidates have the degrees listed on their resumes or why they moved from one position to another.

At this stage, I have already obtained and verified this information, so managers are free to focus on the relationship. Conversation flows easily and smoothly and both parties can concentrate on the most important question: am I going to enjoy working with this person every day? If both can answer that question positively, I know that candidates will be overjoyed when they receive our offer. In this situation, everyone wins.

Dan Kutis is the Corporate Recruiter of The Hamister Group, Inc., a growing hotel and health-care management company. Feedback can be sent to him at news@hamistergroup.com . For more information on The Hamister Group, Inc., see www.hamistergroup.com